If the words "obedience to Christ" makes you worry about what to wear, listen to, speak, or do, you're doing it wrong.
In counseling other Christians—both young and old—I often get asked "Should I stop listening to this..." or "is it still okay to do this..." While I understand the heart behind the question (wanting to please God but not quite sure if it's worth it), any specific answers would be incorrect. First, we cannot please God. Second, the obedience we are called to is DEATH, not abstinence.
The Bible certainly contains guides to behavior that is useful in instructing children (or those whose parents' didn't utilize them) until they receive the revelation of who God is and must be to them. These guides are only useful in that they create the canvas upon which God can reveal Himself. Too many Christian leaders focus on these guides because they must cover the fact they have no relationship with Christ as the Revelation of God and they certainly can't facilitate that relationship for their followers.
We are not called to obey a set of rules but rather to die to ourselves.
The clarion call for those who wish to be united in Christ is to follow Christ to death, burial, and resurrection:
"And he said to all, 'If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.'" - Luke 9:23
“And being found in human form he humbled himself and became obedient unto death, even death on a cross.” - Phillipians 2:8
This obedience is not to a set of "do's" and "don'ts" made by men (see Colossians 2:20-23)—it's not even to abstain from fleshly/sinful actions. Paul says we must put our old self to death. The obedience Christ demonstrates and calls us to is death to self and absolute surrender to God's will. Christians are called to suffer, as Christ did.
At it's worst, the question "Should I do/not do this?" comes from a self that is still very much alive and seeking what it can get away with in compromise! At best, it comes from a heart that does not yet know God.
I have found far too many Christians do not know God.
I think the world is aware of this fact as well.
If we knew God, we'd love Him because He IS love. To know God we must be in a revelation-ship with Him: He reveals Himself as Perfect Love and we are drawn in. The closer we come, the more He reveals, the deeper we fall. This is the revelation-ship of Creator to the creature, God to man, Beloved to one loved.
And if we know God and love God, then we trust His commands are good, so we obey: Take up your cross daily and follow me. He calls us to do as He did, outlined in Phillippians 2: from humility through absolute surrender, through the cross, through death to self—all the way through to resurrection and new life.
To diagnose where you or someone else is struggling in their walk with God and what area needs attention, work backward from this:
Are you walking in resurrection and life as a new creature in Christ?
Has your flesh been crucified with Christ?
Do you obey His commands to follow Him?
Do you trust Him?
Do you love Him?
Do you truly know Him?
Christ came, emptied Himself, took the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of a human, humbled Himself, and was obedient to the will of the Father—gladly obedient to death on the cross.
Grace calls us to follow.
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