If your spiritual education, like mine, lacked any kind of direction on spiritual declarations, their power, and our part in them, read on.
First, let me say that I am GRATEFUL for the adults in my life who made positive declarations over me. Like Aunt Susie who told my entire VBS class and teachers that she wanted to see what I had painted because I always came up with something creative. Or my parents, who rarely said negative things to us and carefully culled negative statements beginning with "You are..." from their talks with us.
From what I know from most women I talk to, I was uniquely blessed to have this kind of upbringing and community.
But, as I said above, I wasn't trained on spiritual declarations. The closest I got was a useful print out of "Who Am I?" that listed all the things God says I am, as a Christian and His child. I recall reading those statements many times and keeping them in my Bible for many years. I found them soothing to my heart when adults and peers in my life made negative, declarative statements over me.
I never knew what to call what they were doing, but it didn't feel right. It felt paralyzing. It felt like a curse (which is what the Bible calls it). The only thing I knew to do was to forgive them or, as I matured, to discuss with my parents ways to counteract them with the truth in the Bible. More often though, I left them unaddressed as I pondered them.
Please note that I am not talking here about loving or Biblical confrontations of sin—bring those on, please! Nor even unloving confrontations of sin, which we can learn from without offense, even though it is painful. (I'm still learning this one.)
I'm talking about people declaring lies or things that may have been true or even may still be true as though they are your identity and you have no hope of change. It is true that we are all sinners redeemed by God's grace, but our identity is NOT a sinner any longer—our identity is found in Christ. It is true that we all sin and are in need of discipline and correction, but our identity is not the sin nor even our struggle with that sin (e.g. we are not addicts, we struggle with addiction until the Holy Spirit changes us and we partner with the Holy Spirit to do the work it takes to no longer succumb.) More on that another time.
In this blog I'm talking about the kinds of declarations that roll around in our brains, stopping us from reaching for Christ. The lies that counter and make us doubt who we are in Christ. The ones that paralyze our walks with God. The ones that become our inner voice, destroying us from within. The ones that become voices in our heads that we pass on to our children. The ones that keep us up at night. The ones that change us. Curse us.
For me, the fall out from the unloving declarations didn't stop until I learned how to counteract them.
Many women I know haven't counteracted the negative declarations over them and are still mired in the mud created from them in their minds. Is this you?
The more I learn about neuroplasty* and our ability to change our own DNA (and future generations' DNA) from what we say to ourselves and the choices we make, the more I realize how vital spiritual declarations are because they are a weapon from God to prevent the negative fall out from these curses. Truth sets us free.
Let me give you a few examples of unloving declarations I have experienced:
1) I had peers who said "I hate you because you are so skinny." (I repent of participating in this kind of declaration to others.) In the past, I just smiled a polite smile.
To counter this one now, I step away from the conversation, quietly and quickly denounce the curse, forgive them, then pray for their own health and wellness. I also take a moment to declare the truth—when the gavel of Heaven strikes, what does GOD SAY ABOUT ME? Whatever THAT is, I declare to my soul and the atmosphere around me.
If I feel more courageous, I confront them with "I know you don't mean that and I don't accept that statement. I appreciate the underlying compliment and we can talk about health and wellness some time."
2) I had peers and adults who said things about me starting with "You always..." or "That's just you, Cathy..." In the past, I'd slump my shoulders and walk away from the conversation, defend myself (which never worked), or try to laugh these things off.
To counter this one now, I stop the stream. This is important: when people are declaring things over you, they are setting off a stream of "reality" that must be countered, stopped, and diverted before it carries you off. I say "No! I may have used to act that way/done those things that way/had that weakness but it was a result of _______ {I fill in with what was the root cause/wound and how Christ dealt or is dealing with that area of my life}."
It requires authenticity and courage but it usually is the right rebuke. We Christians have no business defining others by their un-Christlike-ness since that is what we are all after! It also demonstrates love because it invites them into a more intimate relationship with both us and Christ.
3) I had people in authority over me make judgments and command me, declaring my guilt, and making assumptions. For example, one said, "Young lady, you are not free and you will return to your husband immediately." Now, this person didn't have all the facts but they didn't ask for them either. They didn't know that my ex-husband had already filed for divorce, had affairs with other women, had emotionally abused me, had walked away from God, and others in authority had released me to let the divorce proceed without contest.
In this case, the person ignorantly declared me guilty (by saying I was not free) and that I must return to my husband. That night, I was so shaken that I dreamed of killing myself instead of returning to my ex-husband. When my mom heard of this at lunch the next day, when I was still shaken, she said exactly what I needed to hear: "If you even try to return to that man, I will personally lock you in the attic!" I laugh now, thinking of her response, but it was incredibly reassuring to that young 20-year-old. It definitely countered, stopped, and diverted the stream of reality that had drained me of hope so quickly.
The counter-declarations I have listed above what I would call Truth Declarations, meant to be used as a weapon in situations where the truth is being suppressed or to counter lies being declared. There are other types of declarations. I am learning as I go and as God shows me, so I am no expert but here is a PDF of what I've learned/gathered so far about declarations and what they are/are not, the types, and how they are one of our weapons of warfare. Feel free to comment, question, and share.
Grace counters lies with truth.
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* For more on this topic, read Switch On Your Brain by Dr. Caroline Leaf. And while I do not agree with her on everything she advocates nor have I studied her personal statement of faith or doctrine, she seems to advocate what the Bible says and lines the science available up with the Bible. I have found the book useful for counseling those whose brains have been wired incorrectly by trauma and suffering.