I'm terrible at #exits. In a fight, I always want to be the one who says the pithy zinger and sails gracefully out the door, chin held high. Well, my pride does, anyway. I never do. I'm not the dramatic (read: courageous) type. I usually stick in the fight too long. What does that make me?
Not my husband. He's the one who walks out at the right time. He has left a job with a bang - the kind of bang where a few weeks later his bosses are escorted out by security, all because he left with a bang that made people sit up and figure out that something was very, very wrong if my husband is leaving this way.
When you stay in the fight too long, you experience what I call the Hollow Men Effect:
This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends Not with a bang but a whimper.
(T. S. Elliot)
Rarely do things end with a bang. It's usually more of a #whimper.
How do you end well? How do you say goodbye to fellow colleagues, employees you may or may not get along with? Boss(es)? Clients? What is allowed and what is not? Where does the truth intersect with TMI? Do you pretend, to make it easier on them? On you?
Today, my second day not employed in over two decades, I tally my exits while I sip my tea. My first job ended when I moved. The second, when I moved again. The third ended when I discovered the boss and his assistant in a compromising position before my initial 30 days. The fourth ended when my first husband threatened to end the marriage if I didn't get a job closer to home. (The marriage ended not long after so I'm sure I stayed in the marriage far too long as well.) The fourth ended with a mutual understanding that I wasn't a good fit for the culture, but really I was terrible at the mundane tasks required.
The fifth ended when I left the church - which was probably the most courageous thing I had done at the time in my life. Now that one might have made a bang but it took a while to hear it.
The sixth ended when we were bought by Hollywood. The seventh ended when I experienced sexual harassment in a culture that still hasn't dealt with it's rampant presence. Still, it was definitely not a bang. The eighth ended when I left, after I realized the company was fizzling due to leadership decisions.
The ninth ended yesterday.
Pretty sure it was not a bang. Time will tell if it was gracefull or not.
As far as resources go, this is about the only useful resource on how to leave a company properly that I found: https://www.thebalancecareers.com/how-to-say-farewell-to-co-workers-2063020.